So you want to make your Ex want you back… tell him or her that you are different, your situation is different, you love them, you can give them the world, that type of thing right?
So let me ask you…
What is different now?
What can you give or offer your Ex now that you didn’t or couldn’t before?
Is your mind drawing a blank? Do you feel as if, they SHOULD come back just… well just BECAUSE? You love them right? Isn’t that good enough?
On the other hand you might know exactly where you screwed up or dropped the ball. You might have something to prove, that you’re “different” or you’ve “changed”. You also worry your ex might run off with someone else and completely forget about you. So you worry, panic, stress and end up doing a lousy job of ‘proving’ yourself.
In the end your Ex doesn’t come back, they do leave you and it might take you months or even years to completely get over them.
So what went wrong?
Your wish came true.
But wait, that wasn’t what you wanted!
No? How often do you sit and worry about losing your ex? How much do you think about your ex moving on without you and finding someone new? Compared to perhaps how you’re going to improve and better yourself?
It’s all to do with your mindset.
The mind is a powerful and mysterious thing. Everything that has happened in your life happened first from your mind. If you want your ex to want you back, you need to refocus your energy on aspects of your life that will move you in the direction that you want, instead of a direction you ‘don’t’ want.
Want to prove you’re a trustworthy person? Then start becoming honest right now starting with you. Prove to you first that you’re no longer untrustworthy, that you are changing and you’re not someone immature, misguided and misinformed.
Do this everyday, adding to the things you want to change and continue to evolve until you feel better and better each day. That is how you know you’re on the right path, that you’re willing to prove it to you first that you want this relationship back. After all you’re not a 6 year old anymore, you know that crying and moaning won’t get you what you want, to get results, you just have to do it.
But what about your ex? Won’t they move on and find someone else? You still want them back! How do you stop yourself from thinking about them and risk sabotaging your chances, what do you do!
Here’s the thing, we’ve been taught that if we want someone to like us, we need to show them we like them first, after all this is how we learned to make friends and how we get into relationships in the first place. So naturally your instinct tells you to show your ex you ‘want’ them back. But this isn’t what you ‘should’ do.
It’s hard to admit but your ex has essentially rejected you. Now if a group of people you tried to hang out with told you to get lost, would you beg them to remain friends with you? I highly doubt it.
In some weird way, you should treat your relationship with your ex the same way. No matter how the relationship ended, you should try to accept the break up as gracefully as possible.
Acting this way often will catch your ex off-guard and make them second-guess their decision to break up in the first place.
You will NOT believe this, but you have a TREMENDOUS amount of influence over your ex even if they give off the impression they’re “possibly” over you.
But WAIT, you can use this to your advantage! Find out why your ex still cares and how your actions can greatly influence their decision to come back to you.
Having a plan to get your ex back is THE MOST IMPORTANT thing because it keeps you from being overly emotional at the wrong times.
Thankfully, there IS a solution…
Click Here to Reveal The Closely Guarded Secrets to Getting Your Ex Back
{ 35 comments… read them below or add one }
My girl freind just broke up wih me about two months ago after a nine year relationship. I was completely devistated and crushed. she is not seeing anyone else nor does she plan on it, is what she told me, she still left the window open to be friends, and has contacted out of the blue one day to say hi. Alot of my friends say they can see inside the circle from the outside and say that its no over and she will come back, because there are just to many memories after a nine year relationship, and she never gave me a valid reason why she broke up in the first place. Are there any subtle but positive signs that she would show me to say that she wants to come back. My friends say I dont see it because im inside the circle and their outside looking in.
My ex and i have been broken up for a really long time. prolly 7 months, and i love him more then anything, he is seeing someone right now.. they arent offical but they act like it. He says constanly he wants me over him and that he hates me. idk what to do. is there still a chance?
Hi Katie
Yea I followed all the material with NC and all that but my ex was getting over me. I love her very much but the thing is she keeps accusing me of cheating on her and she says she doesn’t trust me. I bought several makeup and get your ex-back on line books and the material is great but I put my own plan together with all the material I read. It took me two months of hard work and reading and doing all the things in the articles. I got my ex back but she broke up with me again yesterday. I did everything for her. She has two great kids but she has a hard time making them mind. I have helped her with everything. I guess I keep overdoing things for her. I thought thats what a relationship is supposed to be about isn’t it? Well any way my question now is should I give up on her or not. There have been other things going on in our relationship that could fill a book but now I am not sure what to do anymore. Please let me know what your thoughts are. Thanks and If you don’t get back to me I understand because you may be really busy.
Thanks
Mike
Update. Just to let everyone know it has been a year since my ex and I have been broken up. We went out together a few times and she started doing the same BS. So I have moved on and she was dating a guy for about 6 months. He was playing games with her. She finally ended it. Now I am dating some one else and she treats me like gold. She even treats me better than my ex-wife and ex-girlfriend combined. I still love her and her kids but I have to force myself to let her go. Thanks for the articles and the information. Move on people there are other relationships out there probably better than the last one.
im with BreAnna.
the whole thing. my ex says he hates me. and he always tells me to stay out of his life. but im deeep in love with him. he was my first for Every single thing. and he was my first love.. he says he dumped me cause i was immature and everything. but then he gets mad when i say i “like someone new” to see if he gets jealous.
its just one big mess.
what do i do?
My ex and I were togather for seven years. We had our ups and downs but always work it out. I was not crazy about her family and that caused a problem. We broke up and a week later she was with her ex best freinds ex boy freind. Now it has been five months and she will not speak to me. I have done NC and have not called , emailed or texted in almost two months.
my girlfirend want to break up with me because I only make her life chaotic. she says that my rules are just absurd….but I promised her that I would change my character…what should I do??? PLEASE HELP ME……..I’M DESPERATE OF HAVING HER BACK…………
Hey. I learned that if you act desperate it won’t work. You have to act like you don’t care and act like she doesn’t exist. This will help with the healing and help with getting her back at the same time. It takes a lot of work and practice. Try it. It will work it might take about two months or three to get her back but act like your life is so good that you don’t need her back it will help. I did it. it works good luck.
Hey i was in a long dist relationship and my ex broke up with me yesterday and i still love him alot and dont no what to do.he isnt seen anyone else either.i said he was the most important person 2 me and thats when u acted,and he thinks its best for us to forget each other.i know he loves me still and i want him to b with me still…please help me
my ex and i broke up easter of 08. we had dated for 3 and a half years. but with in the 1st year we were together, i liked another guy. but he found out and we broke up. he was so upset and i know i hurt him badly. and he is still hurt.
well me n him got back together and he told me time after time he’ll never be able to forgive me…Well over all that time i still dedicated my life to him, i did everything for him for 2 more years. and we fought all the time. he called me bad names. and i still have a complex over that….
well even after we broke up i still visited him. having “one night stands” if u will, and i know that it was wrong but i couldn’t help myself. I was in love…well after 4 months of that i quit talking to him…I figured I was just hurting myself…
Recently he was in a really bad car accident. and I went to see him. Of course it was weard…but over the past few weeks i have gone to see him maybe 4 or 5 times. and out of those times he has only called me once to come and see him….and last Sunday night I stayed over. only because my parents left me there. well me and him had fun. it was like there was no one around but him and I. It was so great!…..And now I’m starting to miss him again. and i think that since he was in a wreck he’ll change his life for the better …well I want him back and I’ve been reading everything i could to find some way to do it…and i’ve been reading everything on this site….
What should I do to get him back?
me and my (ex)girlfriend broke up 2 days ago,
or should i say she broke up with me,
we’ve been dating for 14 monthes on valentines day, we’ve never had any arguements, problems, anything,
we go to 2 different schools, and i see her as much as i posibly can, and talked to her every night, i always made it clear how i felt about her,,
we talked last week, about how, we’re starting to “drift away” and we’d say that we’d try a little harder the next few months and see how that goes, so i we went to her schools winter homecoming on valentines day, our 14 month anniversary, and it was fun, amazing maybe, we danced the whole time, we kissed. cuddled, had an amazing time, it was hard to say goodbye to her when i had to leave,
then after that she told me she was sick, and everytime i’d call she would make up an excuse or something,
then on thursdday i called her to say good night, she told me she had something to say that was important,
she told me that she thinks we should “see other people” and she kept saying that i didnt do anything wrong, and there wasnt anything wrong with me, but that she felt that 14 months is “too long” to be together, and that she didnt want us to be on bad terms,
i love this girl, she really is all i think about, and care about, i’d do anything for her, ANYTHING.
she said, that she still wants to be friends though, and if we didnt, that she would respect that, and she kept teeling me she was sorry, over, and over again.
she also told me “We’re not getting married, so this would have ended anyway” that didnt make sense to me,
if you go into a relation ship with that kind of mindset, then whats the piont of being with someone, especially 14 months.
ive been besides myself for the past 2 days, everything i see reminds me of her, i went to a concert last night to see my favorute band, that didnt even help, it actually made me feel better,
it feels like theres something i can do, but im not sure, i dont want to see other people, i havent even taken everthing down, pictures of us, gifts cards, presents, i havent changed anything, this just doesnt feel like its happening.
if you can help me, in any way, that would just be amazing,
i miss her so much already, and its only been 2 days,
im 18 years old, it seems young to be complaining about love and all, i know. but i have no idea what else to do
My gf just broke up with me two days ago after alomost three and a half years of happy times together. We fought occasionally but we always manage to patch up in less than a day.
She said it was on Valentines Day that when I gave her so many surprises and showed that how much I loved her, she couldn’t help but feel that she doesn’t love me as much as I do for her and she said she doesn’t want to lie to both of us anymore.
Right now we are not seeing each other but we have been sharing a few small chats online. I miss her so much and I know I want to have her back. What can I do to make her come back to me?
Hi Katie,
My girlfriend & I broke up in October after a 2 yr relationship. We
both are in our early 40′s and we had a serious relationship to the
point where I proposed a little over a year into the relationship. She
initially said yes then said she was not ready. Since that time our
relationship slowly eroded because of her doubting the we had what it
took to make it in the long run. We never fought, but we did lack on
the communication side of things. Before we broke up, she stated that
99% of our relationship was great but something was missing with the
other 1%.
So we had about 3 rocky months before the break-up. When she came over
to break-up with me, I was anticipating it and when she said the “I
can’t do this anymore. I want to end this”, I agreed with her. So over the next month
or so we exchanged some emails but nothing about our relationship. After 5 weeks of no contact, she
surprised me with a “just wanted to say hello” email. Perfect..I
thought I was on my way to getting her back. I waited a couple of
days to respond back in order to not look needy. I emailed her back
asking how she & her daughter were doing and l let her know I was
doing great and that it was good to hear from her. This is where I
think I messed up. I got sick and had a weak moment a couple of days
later. I began to think too much and panicked wondering why she had
not responded to my email yet. So I thought she may have taken my
“I’m doing great” as being insensitive, so I emailed her back asking
her if she would like to do lunch. She responded a few days later in
a friendly manner giving me an update on her & her daughter and asked
about my family. She thanked me for the lunch invite but said she
thought it could be awkward right now but asked me if we could maybe
do it later when we are more comfortable. She also said lets stay in
touch. I responded a couple of days later and agreed that it could be
awkward and that we could maybe get together down the road and left it
at that, other than giving her an update on my family, that was four
weeks ago. The only contact I’ve had with her since, came last week when
she asked me a general non-relationship question about a dog breeder.
So here is my
question, how should I proceed from here? I am not really sure what
she is thinking or how she is feeling. Do I resume no contact? If
so, how long? Or do I call her? I did not anticipate this
in my plan.
Sorry for the long email. Since I have last seen my ex I have lost nearly 40 lbs via diet and
exercise and I am looking great. So I would love for my ex to see me & the changes I’ve
made.
Any advice you can give me would be greatly appreciated!
Thanks,
JB
My ex and i broke up after 6 months of dating. i fell in love with her, and at one point she said she loved me as well. weve always had fights and stuff but it always worked out in the end. at about 5 months we had a big fight. that just lasted for weeks. i always tried to apologize and stuff, but then she started hanging out with her friends 24/7 and never had time for me. i started complaining and she got angry and annoyed. i started nagging her alot. so she suggest a “break” where we were only friend status. but even then i kept complaining and nagging her and i was so afraid of losing her. once the break was over, nothing changed. she kept hanging out with her friends. so i was very needy and i cried alot, but shed get annoyed. finally about 2 days before it turned 6 months, we broke up. but she still liked me. she was crying and kissing me and stuff, but she said she couldnt be in a relationship. i felt kinda good because it felt like she would come back to me. i wrote her lots of letters, and she cried. then after about 3 days after the break up she started getting over me. i still wanna be friends with her but now it feels like shes completely annoyed of me.
then last night she said she liked this guy a while back before we broke up and he dated another chick and she had been really hurt and she said she changed over that. it broke my heart. she said she didnt tell me back then because she didnt want to hurt my feelings.
i really love her. i do. i feel completely lost, my routine, my purpose. i cant feel like im living. i dont know what to do. please help me
okay, so i broke up w/ my ex becuase he lied to me about a party, but i always came back to him when he asked i fall back in love.. but now he is choosing between me and another girl. i love him so much but he just won’t see that. what do i do? should i still want him? HELP!
Me and my ex were together for a year and eight months, non stop. Always together, never did anything without each other, whenever working always came up on my break. Just always together. We started going out my senior year of high school, Which is pretty important to most people. I fell so in love with him i gave up all those basketball games, and soccer games i could of gone to. I gave up my friends, and so did he. Just we were both happy. Then i think emotionally we wanted to have friends in our lives but not hurt one another, so kept it up. So when my ex wanted to do something with his friends i would make him feel bad, and make him just feel like crap because i would be bored without him. I think that finally took a tole on him. I think he just needed space and freedom, and i wasn’t giving him that. I just truly love him with all my heart so i just wanted to be with him. Now something terrible has made me realize that i need to change some things about me, and we can still make it work. Do you think we could. we broke up on good terms, he was just saying he wasn’t happy right now. He is also under tons of stress. but do you think there is still a chance?
My Ex-Girlfriend wants to come back into my life. What should I do? She told me so much hurtful things before she left me for this other guy. Now, April 1st 2009, she wants to return to me, saying: “if only I could get another chance”.She also confessed having a lot of dreams about us having sex and making love. Please tell me what to do. She left me in the ending of January now said that she broke up with the guy in April 1st. We was together for about 1 year and I’ve never cheated on her since we were together and she knows that I am a loyal guy. However, she told me that within the two months of being with the guy, she had sex with him once. What am I to do? If I am to get back together with her, will this affect me in the future? Please, I need some advice. Thank you.
My boyfriend broke up with me 2 months ago, we were together at a party last night, he told me that he still wants me back but the problem is that he said that I’m too controlling. it’s as if he doesn’t want to give me a chance to change. What am i going to do to make him change his mind. i really love him.
Keith, i am sorry dude, i wrote the one before you and i thought My ex left me because he wanted freedom, no he left me for another girl, who is a big hoe, and gross. Which is hurtful, i know how you feel i really do, and honestly the only thing i want in my life right now is for him to come back to my life.. so i would say, give her another chance.. you never know until you try.. make her work for it though, and make sure she is willing to put effort into it as well.
Well, I’m now in a situation where my ex-really wants to come back in my life and I know she’ll do any and every thing that she can to achieve this. Now, last night I was speaking to one of my friends (from the Band) ..the advice he gave me is that not to give my ex a second chance after the way she has hurt me…If it happened once, then it can happen again.
I really and truly do not doubt him because before, when me and her was together, she use to tell me all these sweet words, the same as now but even taken it to a whole different level.
The truth is I really don’t know if she just has no one to turn to now for comfort and if this is the reason she wants us to come back until she stabs me in the heart again.
The most shocking part is that she was pregnant for this guy that she was with. She said that she regretted what she had done and don’t want to end up in Teenage Pregnancy. I decided to help her because she turned to me for help. Really and truly, when I was finally at the point of moving on in life she wants to come back now. I also want to move on in life but cutting the cord with her, is what I feel I don’t have the courage to do. I’m confused.
me and my boyfriend were together for a year and 2 months. we had a few ups and downs, but besides that, we were great. last week, out of nowhere, he decided to break up with me. He said i was too clingy and obsessive and treated him badly. i really dont know what i did. can someone help me? i dont know what to do! i want him back!
no one can understand the women only god himself
well i broke up with this kid he is dating some ohter girl he said he loved me before but i d o love him i just didnt want 2 tall him waht can i do now if he has a girl?
Hey I broke up with my girl about 1 month ago and we dated for 18 months she went to college and a week later she said she doesnt love me anymore and she says she just wants to be friends but i tried and i cant cause im still so in love with her. what should I do is it over is there still a chance?
My girlfriend broke up on the 20th of October after 5 and 1/2 months of dating. We did date for 1 and 1/2 months last summer. I saw it coming, it felt like she check out of the relationship about ten days before we broke up. Talking to her on the phone was like talking to myself. She broke up with me because we didn’t connect. I agreed with her because that’s all I could do, but I feel that we do connect it’s just we haven’t been connecting lately. I think if we wanted we could work it out.
The problem is that we have the same group of friends, this past weekend was the first time I saw her in ten days. We were both passive aggressive and tried to treat each other civil. However the day after my friends went out to the bars and she was shutting me out. She was not herself and whenever I tried to talk I didn’t get much of a response like she was purposly trying not to connect with me.
The sad thing is that no matter how bad she treats me I will still always love her.
me and my ex have been broken up for about a year but i see him all the time and i still love him. he was dating a girl from is town but they have broke up MANY times and he comes back to me then leaves again. i try to convince myself that im over him but every time i see him i fall for him again
pityful right.
My girlfriend broke up with me on November 21st after dating 2 and 1/2 years I saw it coming she started hiding her cell phone not inviting me to go places with her like before started staying away from her apartment longer than usual, she would call me and say she was on the way a 10 min drive would turn into hour, the damage was already done in the first year we met ,I had one fling she never caught me but she always suspected me because of supporting circumstance she just couldn’t trust me through out our relationship even though long after that I made adjustments, after pleading and begging,calling and texting her to take me back for about the first 10 days. I stop after reading online how other guys got through it, once I stop contacting her to my surprise about 17days after the break up she called me we talk for about 40min she admitted that she had a crush on another guy she said that she never slept with him but only kiss him once about a week prior to the break up (Lol) but he has a girlfriend with two kids who has been cheating on him and once he file his income tax he is going to dump his live in girlfriend give her 1/2 the income tax money and move in with my ex and her four kids, I never herd of anything as stupid as this before, I know I was not right about what I done ,but that is foolish that a woman would leave her man who she thought was cheating to be with a man who is cheating can that kind of relationship last?
ive been with this girl for the past 1 year and 2 months she saids that she dont see me being with her and she saids she gonna find someone new when i right here she said i was the first at everything and i wanna get her back but she lives in vegas and i live in oklahoma what should i do? do i fly to see her and risks if she saids no or yes? we did alot in those years i lied and i cheated but i wanna make things right shes been there for me but i was to selfish to realize i had something special in front of me. She was my first love we was engaged for 11 months but she got tired of me i guess and dumped me i really want her back please help any advice helps thanks
me and my girl broke up last night and i wanna get her back i lied to her and cheated weve been engaged since march of last year i want her back in my life what should i do and we are doing a long relationship thing also do you think i should fly to see her? and see if things work out for the best?
My boyfriend broke up with me after 5 1/2 years. We were highschool sweethearts. We moved in together about a year ago and then things just went sour from that point on. We started arguing about everything, I could never trust him for some reason. Out of no where he started wanting to hang out with his friends all the time, and theyre all cheating manwhores. I guess since my ex was the only one in a relationship from his friends, he felt like he was missing out. Our arguing was a good enough reason for him to back out and not want to be with me anymore. Im moving to another state in a couple months but I didnt want things to end..not like this. Actually, I never wanted things to end. He changed, but I know hes a wonderful guy. Anyway, Ive been doing whatever I can on my part to possibly get him back by cutting him out of my life. I cant help but know hes okay and happy with his life right now and most importantly, I dont know if I can handle him hooking up with someone else–we’ve only been with eachother. My friends say that it’ll take him to hook up with someone else to realize how much I mean to him..I dont want it to get to that and am hoping if theres a way for him to come back before it gets that far? Thanks for the advice.
My boyfriend and I started dating november and I broke up with him at the end of march. We got back together in june. I’m just trying to figure out when our aniversary is.
its been weird for ages, i have been ignored and avoided. we live together, but its like he’s a ghost.So i made a point of finishing it. I can’t be a slave to his mixed emotions anymore. Love always gets in the way though. He has no idea how much has hurt me over the past few weeks. Wish he would have been honest and finished me ages we moved into a new place. problem is now, im just shocked at how much time and effort i put in, and the little amount he did…
Me and My boyfriend broke up on 17th July. IT was expected but i was expecting more of a make up! he just told me to meet him and said he wants to end this relationship and that we are not for eachother as we think very different…aint we all suppose to have our own opinions?? we both are 24. He said he wants to keep everything the same…he wants our families to remain good friends (Even though they met cos of us as we wanted to marry eachother) he said, if ur gona do anything to urself, i will do it too…he was emotional and i was throwing tantrums so we decided to meet again after one day and at that time i was calm and got over our break up convo….i talked to him properly and agreed on the break up…but when i agreed on his statement tht yes we are very opposite…there was a pause from his side…i wonder why and then after a while, i just stopped the convo and felt good that atleast i said something that made him sad too….we had a pause for about 3 min and he said nothing at all……i really want to reconnect with him..as i feel we just grew apart cos of fights and misunderstandings..fights over the phone are neva right and should not be taken seriously as most of our fights were on the phone…..how do i get him back? i love him alot …
well me and my boyfriend just broke uppp after a 9month & 2weeks relationship i really love him and we neva stop thinking about eachotha we talk everydaii and he says he loves me but he got a girl next day we lefted eachotha and he still wants us to be friends wif benfits but he hurt me alot while going out becuz he fucked his ex and many other things and he still says he wants me bck and we still argue like old times we act as if we still go out iloveeehim very much ireally want him any body got suggestions for me to have him back please email meee
Hi! My boyfriend broke up with me randomly one day a month ago after one and half years. He just said that he wanted to see other people and that he just doesnt like me anymore. I dont understand. Like I do, we used to fight a lot and whatever, but I miss him so much. He is flirting around now and watching him with other girls is so devestating. I want him back. We talk, but he will never talk about the break up and gets mad when I mention it. He doesnt get jealous, and he doesnt care what I do. I am so hurt and I want him back. Can you help?