Are you going through a break up and want to know how to get your ex boyfriend back? Has your boyfriend decided that, out of the blue, he doesn’t want to be with you anymore? How could this have happened? If you want to know how to get your ex boyfriend back, I want to first reveal some of the biggest mistakes you could be making in trying to get him back.
3 Top Mistakes When Trying to Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back
Mistake #1 – Calling him over and over again
This is one of the biggest classic mistakes when getting your ex boyfriend back. This is when you can’t stop calling your boyfriend or trying to get him to talk to you. You start to panic when he doesn’t respond straight away, and you find yourself sitting by the phone waiting for it to ring. Worse still, often you end up calling, texting or emailing over and over again, sending a string of messages that seem to get more incoherent than the last. The bottom line is to stop calling him if he is not responding or even telling you to leave him alone. This means he wants to be left alone!
Mistake #2 – Declaring your love and over-apologizing
If you have made a mistake, then very likely your first instinct is to want to beg and plead for forgiveness, and tell him how much you love him. This hardly ever works because the dumper is usually emotionally detached to the situation as it is. They are prepared for you to freak out and get emotional. They are also going to think that asking for forgiveness now is probably a bit too late.
Mistake #3 – Acting out of jealousy, rage and hurt
Essentially you’re emotionally out of control, and when your emotions are a wreck, you tend to say and do things you wouldn’t normally do. You may lash out at your boyfriend, call him names, try to guilt-trip him back into the relationship or threaten him. These are emotional outbursts that can damage a relationship severely if repeated over a period of time. It’s important to allow things to cool off if you were acting out at the heat of the moment. Do apologize briefly afterward, but leave it at that!
How to Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back Even When You’ve Made All These Mistakes?
If you’re making any of these mistakes, there IS hope. I’m going to reveal a very simple strategy that will eliminate your chances of making any of these and take you in the RIGHT direction to get your ex boyfriend back.
Here it is – stop trying to contact him at all, wait until HE contacts you first!
This is essentially the No Contact Rule – and it can be extremely effective if you can stick to it. Most people in an emotional state, fail to maintain a consistent level of no contact.
There are a lot of benefits to doing this:
- You’re allowing your ex boyfriend the space and time to get over the pain of the break up
- You’re allowing YOURSELF the space and time to get over the pain of the break up
- You’re preventing yourself from potentially making anymore embarrassing mistakes when you’re in an extremely emotional state of mind.
- You’re giving him time to actually MISS you.
- You’re giving him the impression that you’re moving on and thus he will more likely contact you to see where the relationship is still at.
Believe it or not these are all benefits. BUT, you may worry that starting No Contact will have negative effects as well.
Some of the common worries people have about No Contact when getting an ex boyfriend back are:
- What if my ex boyfriend forgets about me?
A: He will NOT forget about you (how quickly can you forget about someone you once loved?)
- Wouldn’t it simply help him move on faster?
A: If by move on, you mean he is healing from the pain of the break up, then that is actually a GOOD thing. If your goal is to get your ex boyfriend back, you want him to heal from the break up and remember why he fell for you in the first place. Besides, men tend to find it harder than women to move on after a break up anyway, so rest assured this is not a bad thing.
- What if he finds someone else?
A: Possible, but unlikely. Even if he does, it would be temporary and overall harmless to your relationship.
- What if he is already seeing someone else?
A: Again, if he is, it’s 99% a rebound relationship and overall harmless to your relationship.
- What if my ex boyfriend is stubborn and doesn’t contact me?
A: He will… I almost guarantee it.. especially if he really loved you in the relationship. He will find some excuse or some stupid irrelevant reason to contact, even if it’s not an initially “nice” one.
- What if by him thinking I’m moving on, he will simply move on as well?
A: Actually, you will find that if he believes you are moving on, he will definitely contact you, almost 100% guarantee he will. This is because people want what they can’t have, AND we are naturally curious. Even if he calls you just to congratulate you on moving on and how “happy” he is, he will still contact you. That’s what you want.
So I hope that makes you feel more at ease with starting No Contact. It’s not as bad as it appears and it works just as well in moving on as in getting an ex boyfriend back.
Now, for the few who CAN’T start no contact due to your special circumstance, I recommend using Limited Contact instead. This means, avoid your ex boyfriend when you can, but when you can’t, be nice, civil, brief and short. Keep emotions out of your interactions.
3 Tips on How to Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back
So here’s how to get your ex boyfriend back if you’re using the initial No Contact tactic.
Tip #1 – Bring Back The Girl He Fell In Love With
Remind him of the person he fell in love with every time you do come into contact. If one of your best qualities is your sense of humour, your positive outlook and your ability to make people feel good. Bring these out ten fold when he is around you. You want to remind him why he fell in love with you in the first place. Just don’t over do it and make it too obvious you’re trying to please him. This is another method that will only be effective once you use the NC method above.
Tip #2 – Know Why Your Ex Boyfriend Left And How It’d Be Different The Second Time Around
If you don’t know why he left, then you can’t start to fix the problem. At the end of this article I’m going to reveal how you can find out exactly what went wrong and how to stop future break ups from occuring.
Tip #3 – Make Your Ex Boyfriend Chase You
Men love a challenge. If you make it too easy on him to have you, he is going to lose interest quickly as well. Don’t give in to sleeping with an ex boyfriend until you are sure he is willing to commit to you again. Make him chase you, work for your affection and want to spend more and more time with you on his own.
If you’d like an in-depth guide on how to get your ex boyfriend back, I’d like to introduce you to The Ex Recovery System. This is a step by step system on how you can win your boyfriend back. You’ll discover:
- How to be the one in control of the relationship, so your ex boyfriend is chasing you instead of the other way around.
- The correct way to start No Contact, tips on maintaining no contact and how to gain enough emotional control to start contact again.
- How to get your ex boyfriend to contact you with a simple letter. I’ll show you what to say to get an instant response.
- How to show your ex boyfriend you’ve changed and things will be better the second time around.
- Exactly why he left, what men want and how to keep a man from leaving a relationship.
- The exact step by step blueprint to how to get your ex boyfriend back, win back his heart and having him begging and chasing YOU again.
I’m the author of The Ex Recovery System and I encourage you to have a look for the full scoop here: