Here’s a guest article from Veronica I thought I’d share =)…
There are a number of things you can do now that you find yourself suddenly single. This time your world is no longer filled with all-things-“(name of your ex)” but it’s easy to fall into that self-pity mode. It won’t be easy to get over the break up, but here are some tips on what to do after a break up you can try.
1. Find a hobby or revive an old one
Remember how you won the art competition in fourth grade? Or how you directed a play in your junior year that had everyone sniffing on their hankies? That was what you liked doing before and it could be something you’d like to do now. You may view it as a waste of time at first (which is quite ironic because now that you’re free, you’ve got plenty of time to waste), since you aren’t going to make money out of it but its value would be in a form of healing for you, which is more than money can buy.
So, find a hobby or revive an old one. Do it not to please anyone, but to occupy yourself. Do it because at one point in your life, holding that brush made you feel you are worthy of something and that you can do something great, which you can.
Malls and markets are a great way to spend time shopping and finding things that can inspire you for some arts and crafts. Whether you find vegetables that could inspire you to cook the chopsuey recipe your mother left you as a legacy, or a trash-to-treasure cabinet that can use some repainting with your special brush, you will have spent a rewarding day outside enjoying the exploration.
Reading is the best method of escape for most people. If you read, your mind is taken off all the memories of the break up. Reading also enriches the mind and enlivens the spirit. So, bury yourself in a good book and get to know the characters in a story. You will not only find yourself being transported into a new world but you’ll also realize that there’s a bigger world out there for you.
There are plenty of good books to flip through. A good list is The Modern Library’s 100 Best Novels of the Century from Random House Publishing. When you get yourself hooked in these books, you will never again ask what to do after a break up.
4. Reconnect with friends
It’s about time you write to your old friends for a catch up. Remember your classmate from sixth grade who always shared her lunch with you? How about your cousin in the Salvation Army? Writing them would let them know that you’re thinking about them and they would certainly appreciate your thoughtfulness.
Combine all of the above and not only will you have a great time connecting with people and with yourself – you’ll start to see your relationship from a different perspective. Standing back from the situation will help you easily spot the problem areas in your relationship. That is when you empower yourself with what is clearly in front of you.
Not all Ex’s should remain Ex’s, find out if you should recover your relationship and fall in love all over again -> The Ex Recovery System.